Retro Review : She

Directed by

Avi Nesher

Written by

Avi Nesher

Starring

Sandahl Bergman

David Goss

Quin Kessler

Music By

Justin Hayward

Motörhead

Rick Wakeman

Continental Films

1982

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDA9XDXcD18[/youtube]

 

Holy shit, y’all. This movie was all sorts of B-Movie awesome. The plot is a little silly, but we like silly. SO the apocalypse happened…nay the “cancellation” happened, and society is all sorts of different. The land is divided by different factions; one of which is led by a Goddess named “She” (Sandahl Bergman). In her land women rule and men are slaves. She knows her way around the land which is why 2 hunks kidnap her ass because one of the hunk’s sister was kidnapped by this creepy dude (Quin Kessler). From here on out the group encounter numerous perils and leave a high body count.

This film was a ton of fun. It had it all…werewolves, giants in tutu’s, nazi’s, you get the drift. The action was pretty terrible…hell, Power Rangers had better fight choreography, but for whatever reason I didn’t mind. The soundtrack is awesome. When you think post-apocalyptic warrior movie what springs to mind? Some strings…heavy percussion…something that rings “period piece.” Well this movie said “hells no” to that bullshit. This film has a heavy metal soundtrack…and it works.

I did notice something that made my eyebrows tingle. So this film takes place in the future, right? Well that racist in your family will be happy to know that in this future there are no ethnic minorities…just whities. This made me frown.

Frowning aside, this film was a lot of fun and definitely worth a little Netflix streaming.


Game Review : Dragon Age 2

Dragon Age : Origins is one of my favorite games. The story was epic, the characters memorable and the game incredibly deep. It seems like just yesterday I was using a corkscrew to pry the cellophane off Origins. Now its sequel is blowing up my 360.

Which Hawke will you be?

The Good

Story

In Dragon Age 2 players assume the role of Hawke, the “Champion of Kirkwall.” Unlike Origins, Hawke can only be human. Hawke can be either male or female, and can be either a mage, warrior, or rogue. The story begins as Hawke and his/her family flees that ravaged nation of Ferelden and land on Kirkwall. For a more in depth report of the story check this article via wiki.  Just know this- the story is rich, touching, and full of surprises. Oh, and if you import your save data from Origins then those events will be mentioned. Such a nice touch.

Presentation

This game is much, much prettier than its predecessor. The different races (Elf, Human, Dwarf, Qunari) have all been remodeled along with some of the baddies. Backgrounds are also rich and crisp. The magic effects are also pretty wild.

The soundtrack is equally as impressive, which should come as little shock. The voice acting is a little shaky in parts, but overall it is top notch.

The Bad

It’s all in the Details

Sue me. I’m gonna be nitpicky. Should you choose make your Hawke anything other than white then your mother has some ‘xplainin’ to do because you will look shockingly different than your brother and sister. Come on BioWare. Did you not take notes from Fallout 3? In that game if you make your character African-American guess what? Your characters father is also African-American. This sort of oversight is annoying.

In-Game Mechanics

So how does the game play? Well…it is different than Origins. Whereas Origins is more geared towards team battle; Dragon Age 2 is more focused on the action. It does take a little while to get used to…but once you do it is pretty fun.

This is Reality, right?

Again, it is all in the details. This game spans a decade, right? So explain to me why your character and his/her allies never seem to age. And why does the city never change as well? BioWare, we expect more from you.

Final Verdict

This game is a ton of fun and is far superior than most games on the shelves. However, when compared to Origins it feels short and at times repetitive.  If you’ve seen one sewer, you have apparently seen them all. The game was not at all challenging (except for the duel with the Qunari leader.) Replay value aside-I still rate this a buy.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8mn1rVakZg[/youtube]

Episode 53 : Trapdoor

Gelatin. On today’s show Jill, Jon, and Paul devour candy and discuss a variety of topical topics including : a 90210 landmark up for sale, Kobe Bryant fined $100k for calling a ref a gay slur live on ESPN, 6 very important things we are running out of, West Texas becoming more lonely, and the Department of Justice’s pressing the red button on online poker.

This week’s featured song is “Stuck in my Id” by Reptar.

Episode 52 : Biplexual

Happy Anniversary to us! Secretly Timid turns 1 April 15th. On this week’s show Diane comes out as a biplexual, Jon is hungover, and Jill and Paul eat Easter candy. News stories includes a slut march in Canada, a man who was arrested for being naked in his home was finally cleared of charges, young men are mysteriously disappearing along the Canada/US border, and a company offers post rapture pet care. Later, Jill updates a previous twitter face-off and accepts a challenge from Jon.

photo by Michael Ann German

This week’s featured song is “Baby Don’t You Cry” by Fergus & Geronimo

Evening Bender : Shooting the Shit with Julie and Jeremy Prince

Danielle and Jon discuss SB 354 (the senate bill which would legally allow students and faculty to carry concealed firearms) with Julie Gavran and Jeremy Prince. Later, Danielle and Jeremy call Senator Jeff Wentworth’s office (you can call too at (512) 463-0125) to voice their concerns. If you would like to participate in the rally to keep guns off Texas public college campuses, click the hyper link like a badass.

Humpday Funny : Olivia Munn, Meet MC Hammer

photo via complex.com

This is an oldie but a goodie. Ya know, the teleprompter is supposed to be your friend. Still, sometimes these little machines can make even the most hardy of on-air talent stumble. Before Olivie Munn was on Perfect Couples and The Daily Show, she co-hosted G4’s Attack of the Show with Kevin Pereira. Although I wish she never left ATS, I am glad such highlights will exist forever.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZG9Wt2tXHAQ[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fb27wb8UpOE[/youtube]

Episode 51 : Boner for President!

The partisan panties fly on episode 51! Jon has a headache, Diane and Jill eat candy, and Paul takes the day off to fill out his application for Bravo’s The A-List. News stories include 3 stories involving organ donation : Comedian Ricky Cisco’s selfless donation to a Facebook friend’s husband, a recipient contracts HIV from his donor, and a follow-up to a story previously discussed involving convicted sisters. Maine Legislators introduced a bill that if passed would loosen existing child labor laws. Also, the Supreme court overturned a ruling that would award a wrongly convicted man $14 million for his 18 years (14 of which were on death row) in prison. The DA (Harry Connick Sr.) withheld evidence that would prove his innocence. Finally, Chad Gibson, a man whose skull was fractured during the Rainbow Lounge raid in 2009, was awarded $400k from the city of Fort Worth.

Later, Jill pits Big Dick Hunter against Kelly Mohr-Close (of the Pugs and Kelly Show) in this week’s twitter face-off.

This week’s featured song is “When it Comes to You” by Dead Ghosts.